High rise farming

Did you see the headlines in newspapers across the continent today? "Record Snow Pack in BC Mountains causes flooding: global warming called into doubt." No? I wonder why. The mystery of the dog that didn't bark. And here in Victoria our spell of warm, sunny weather last week was short-lived. The rain came back on Monday and it's been windy...like March, only warmer.
There was an honest to goodness headline, though not on the front page, that was mildly encouraging. At the G8 meeting our own PM gave Bono the tone deaf Bonehead the cold shoulder. Why anyone pays the slightest attention to that twerp is beyond my ken.
We are having something called a pocket market in our office building today where local organically grown produce will be on sale to whatever office workers here can be persuaded to pay really high prices. It's all to save the planet don't you know. I saw an article (in Popular Science, I think) about another approach to saving the planet and feeding it at the same time. This fellow has the idea of building high rise farms in the middle of the cities. Using hydroponics and other advanced methods, he can also recycle sewage, recover water and ever so much more. This might not be such a bad idea if another brilliant idea is implemented. This is called 'rewilding,' a word that means reintroducing large predators and ungulates to fields and woodlands near where you live. Isn't that wonderful. Lions and tigers and rhinos and maybe even elephants. If you think a few white tailed deer munching on your rosebushes is ever so sweet, imagine how an elephant would look. The sheer nobility of such a sight! Hint: get out your shovel for all that great organic fertilizer. You'll need a wheelbarrow.
Of course farms and suburbs would be very much in the way for such a scheme to succeed, and the obvious answer is to put ourselves in cages. Instead of sprawling all over the place we should all live in huge highrises and put walls around our cities so we don't contaminate the planet any more than necessary with our disgusting selves. High rise farms would fit right in.
Now, when I refer to disgusting humanity what I mean is us white folks. Sure, the Indians could go back to living on the land in blissful harmony with nature just like they did before the honkies took over. Just think of how wonderful life will be for them, chipping flint, scraping hides, making porcupine quill beads to decorate their condowickiups. And we could have it all on television! Aboriginal survivor! Think of all the university theses the sociologists could write. And for those who can no longer tolerate living in the high rise cloisters of honkiedom could apply to be adopted by the neoDakotahs at a ceremony featuring certain herbs they hold sacred.
Of course, the Dakotahs might not all want to go back to the old ways. And so some strategy must be developed to keep them from ever learning how to smelt metals or bake bricks. And we can't have them learning how to prevent disease or store food otherwise they might become too numerous for the land to support. But these are minor details that could be worked out. I'm not sure exactly what should be done with black people. After all, they don't rally belong in America either, do they. As far as the Chinese and the Hindus, it's just to late for them. They'll have to be sent back in junks and dhows to where they came from, and only be allowed to fish with harpoons and such on their way back. I guess an exception could be made for the saintly David Suzuki. Perhaps he could keep his domicile on Quadra Island where the grateful natives could bring him offerings.